Back, going

Salam :)

Singing Yuna's Missing Star while listening to the song and Im here on my bed spending the last few hours before hopping on a bus to my destination at the northern part of the county for 5 weeks more. So at least my holidays will not be that 'free'. Ill have things to do.

Adik is also packing for her trip, reminds me of myself 2 years ago. Sigh. Wish Im going too. Heheh.

So all my bags are packed, again. I havent even unpacked the stuffs when I come home 2 weeks ago. Takpelah. Hehe. Am looking forward for tomorrow, seeing Gee and my friends from the class.

See ya later. Am back to school people. :)

Regards, Qila

bla bla

Salam. :|

Just an ordinary day, again. Woke up late (hee) and watch TV. Watched 'After 12' that is hosted by Jamie Aditya, you can find it in channel 703 or 707 I always confused them and for today's reruns, it features Jakarta!!! Well, Jamie Aditya is from Jakarta so when I switched that channel I was terkejut sebab the host can talk Bahasa. Bahasa Indonesia Gaul is my 3rd favourite language after Bahasa Malaysia and English of course, so I always get pretty excited when I hear Indonesians talk. And I am pretty good in Bahasa Indo because I spent close to 4 months mingling, studying and shopping with Indonesians while Im in Jakarta a year ago. Taxi drivers, the SAs all assume that Im Indonesians, which I take as a compliment, for being able to adapt to their culture and language in a short period of time. Well have to thank the sinetrons, Jelita and suchs that I am able to speak the language fairly fluent. So watching the tv shows stirs up memories while Im there, the places like Monas, Grogol, Tomang, Senayan, Cilandak and the malls, OMG the malls.. Taman Anggrek, Sencity, Grand Indonesia (My fav because of its architecture), PIM, Citos and many more. We used to just wander around the malls (because we dont have the rupiahs to spend) and just look at Indonesia beautiful people. The food!! Ayam penyet, tempe, pisang cokelat, gorengan, nasi goreng gila (heaven although the name's crazy) and pop ice. nyammmmy..

The sisters are going on an Euro Trip, without me. Hehe, no hard feelings, I had my fun during my trip 2 years ago, so yea, I wish them safe, great journey, and lots of things for me when they come home yayyy :))) Tp sedikit sedih sebab tak boleh hantar diorang di KLIA, I am most probably will be busting my arse studying for another 3 subjects. Subjects top ups sucks. So yea, kissing gooodbye to getaways in KL. :p

So i am going back to Perlis after approx 2 weeks holiday-ing for subjects top ups. 3 subjects, 9 credit hours. Gilaaa tak?? I am supposed to be finding a job right now and I have to go back study. Not that I am complaining, I can see Gee for approx another 5 weeks but we both know, I am going back to Trg sooner or later. But I apreciate the time, and we'll spend it wisely so there would be no regrets, insyaAllah. And am going back on Sunday. Yes. Baru berjumpa gfs sekali and I have to go back already. Gfs, have fun oke, without me. :((

Wateverrr.

Regards, Qila

Fumes

Salam :)

Been lazyyyyy to update blog. Sebab apa? Entahh. Haha. So lets see my activities for the past week hmm.

Left my number at Rotiboy, for part time. Hm entah dapat tak The kakak doesnot sound promising, but... Ada rezeki ada lah. At least sampai hari konvo nanti bulan 8. Not that long kan. :)

so adalah benda2 yang sangatttttttttttt menyakitkan hati yang berlaku, fuhh bila ingat balik rasa macam nak pindah tak mau duk KT. Boleh hahah. Of cos Im bringing ibu and ayah with me hee :D

1. Orang yang salam nak tak nak. Well saya dari kecik lagi diajar untuk bersalam kalau dengan orang yang lagi tua. Walaupun dulu time kecik pernah rasa konfius untuk salam dengan lelaki, tapi sekarang I really dont mind salam dengan lelaki sebab bagi saya, saya salam tu tanda hormat. Saya salam ikhlas, bukan dengan niat nak gedik atau apa, so bagi saya there's no harm in shaking hands with lelaki other than your ayah, ayah sedara etc2. And one more, saya diajar untuk salam sambil cium tangan. I mean bukan cium sloppy and penuh basah lidah menjlat2, just tunduk kepala tu je. But orang kat sini seem to be UNcomfortable bila buat camtu. I mean HELLO saya bersopan kot dengan anda, pls appreciate la, bukan kasi kunci kereta untuk saya salam! Egh, sangat spoil my day lahhh.

2. Judgy people. Hmm ni ibu yang cakap. Orang Terengganu suka judge base on your appearance. Okay so saya tak pakai tudung tapi Im decent. Selagi ibu tak cakap apa and are comfortable with what Im wearing, anda nak tenung apekehallllll? And bila saya camni saya jatuh kat standard anda yang level 2,3,4 dan seterusnya ke? At least bagi saya saya tak letakkan expectation untuk orang expect saya ni macam malaikat. Kalau saya baik, Alhamdulillah kan. Kalau saya jahat, well, bukan benda pelik. Fiuh.

3. Promoter yang macam %##!$. When my mum waves her hand at you, it means she's saving you time laa to not explain things to us. So you can use the time to explain whatever benda useless yang you are selling to other people. Bukan ajuk and say things that we cant understand when we say NO. Sorry saya tak faham kebanyakan perkataan, tapi on the other hand, Im glad I dont. Saves me from sakit hati and stuff. Mana nak dapat customer kalau perangai macam $!##RER#Q$#!#??? Screw you, harap tak dapat customer sampai la saya lupa macam mana you treat my mum, us and orang2 lain. Perangai macam sampah. There goes core Terengganu-ian for you. *Btw saya tak mengaku saya Terengganu jati, Im only half Terengganu smirk

4. And shop assistant yang ingat kedai dia akan sentiasa ada customer yang mungkin memberi keuntungan seperti saya. Thanks for ignoring me and bersikap sangat kurang ajar semasa saya dan ibu mahu melihat barangan anda. Mungkin saya akan kembali ke kedai anda dalam jangka masa beberapa tahun lagi yang mana anda mungkin sudah dibuang kerja pada saat itu. :)))

So sekarang saya konfius, is this what Ill be facing for this time being? Patut lah I rather stay at home, watch TV or fb. Sebab the people I love, I find it at home, and in my laptop. I miss Perlis. Really.

And I've become so bitter staying here. Sebab toooooo many kurang ajar people. And yes, di Terengganu saya sangat sombong, I dont smile as much and I jeling a lot. Yep Im hostile, sebab once you jadi banyak mulut or terlebih ramah, you know that people will then talk behind your back. Am avoiding that. Its tiring to stay this way, tapi I know once I come home, seeing ibu and ayah, and the faces in my laptop, Ill be allright. Ill be allright. :))

Regards, Qila.

I hearts

Salam :)

Not that much of an update, except that Im on webcam like all the time with Gee, so yea, tak keluar bilik pun tak apaaaa. I dont minddddd hahaha. Its nice. :)

Dan saya sedang membuat list untuk my sisters so they dont have to susah2 fikir apa nak beli for me on their trip nanti. Am I the most sweetest sister or whattt?? Hahahhaha. They have to buy my I heart t-shirts wherever they go as Im a collector for I hearts t-shirts. Sekarang dalam collection is London, Hong Kong and Paris. I totally forgot to buy Jakarta and Bandung when Im there haritu. Nvrmind. So that is what I want when they go for their trip. Heee. Tak kisahlah Im not there yet or what so ever. I just want the t-shirts :)))

Regards, Qila

Pics

Salam. :)

Images from the webcam, and feeling like wanna express how I am feeling right now. Hehe. Its just plain loveeeee.

And hearing the sound coming from other people's car, always make me remember how comforting the humm of PCP's engine. How the ignition sounds, how the 'tett tett tett' sound when Gee reverse the car. How I asked him on our early dates, 'Kenapa gear reverse kete ni sebelah gear 1?' How he always wants to open the window when we go through auto car wash, which is of cos the passenger side, with me sitting in it. The one time I went a little bit crazy and want to honk at a sleeping gas attendant. How we stop at many various gas station to pee, and sometimes to just buy dadih/ air freshener. I miss the mango ones. Hehe. So many sweet memories, and not to mention the fights on the road. The time when PCP had door problems and my door cant be opened from inside, how sweet people must thought my boyfriend is, and how gedik I am to let my boyfriend open the door. Haha, sweet times, until the door is fixed. Grrr. I miss the cat on the dashboard, miss fixing so it sits properly. Miss drying my hair by rolling the window down, and stocking up Mentos, just in case for Gee if he gets sleepy when he's on the way back.

Yeah, its all about the humm of the car. And the person behind the wheel. And this blog is somewhat dedicated to him. Hehe. He's family too. :)

Regards, Qila

Missing.

Salam :|

Was watching mtv, and Fearless - Taylor Swift was on. And suddenly my stomach flips and turns, wasnot a good feeling. Its because its one of the songs I listen to early in our relationship, a song that I really2 like. And when I hear it, it brings so much memories of spending time in his car, on the road, of talking things. I really, really miss that.

And thanks to my webcam, and his now-okay intenal mic, he can see me whenever he is in front of the laptop, and sayang, I can hear you, and thats enough. But seeing u is better, so 3G okay? Hehe.

I miss you.

Regards, Qila

Selamat.

Salam :|

Finally reached home, and now officially in a new phase of my life and relationship.

Life : Working, furthering. Im taking time to choose, I want to relax first. :)

Relationship : Long distance. Approx 500km apart. :( Arghh LDR!!

I wanted to work, and if I can, I also want to further. Ill see what comes first. But it would be nice if I can do both. So wish me luck, and opportunities. :) I actually just want to work simple first. Receptionist, cashier that sort of thing. Just to get me going you know. To get the working vibe, and also to earn some cash. Im paying installments now, so yea. Responsibilities, responsibilities. Tp sukaaaaa :))) After that then I want to work WORK. Real work I mean. We'll see, Im confused myself haha.

So 500km is separating us right now, but thanks to Skype, YM, Gtalk, phoneessss, I think the distance can be shortened. Its not as if we're in diff country, or even diff time zone. We both need to adapt with us being far from each other, so sangat perlu LESS sulking, LESS fights and more lurrrveeeee. Oke sayang? :) Ill see u in a blink love love.

Rumah is in disaster mode due to the renovation bleurghh. Serabut oke rumah. Tapi after da siap, I think the house will be looking pretty gooodd. And thank God for aircond. Save my lifeeeeeeee. :)) Am not coming out from this room for at least 45 years of my life :)

Gee is at KL, didnt get a chance to meet up at Gurun, no rejeki. Hmm. Tapi yesterday he already met the Parents so weehooo. Am happyyyyy. Too bad he cant join us for dinner. Hmm nex time k love, we'll set up family dinner together, that wud be nice kan? It wud be super fun :))

Harumanis was great. :)

Sate Lanang was superb. :)

Home is as usual, comforting. :)

Being away from your boyfriend, cancels out everything. :(

Okayyy I am exaggerating. I love being at home, and I love Gee. Wish I can have both.

Regards, Qila

sigh

Salam. :|

Having mixed feelings.

How can I leave when what's important to me is here?
But how can I not leave, when I have no purpose anymore?

Well I promise Ill come back, and I will keep it.

To Gee, absence sharpens love, presence strengthen it. So lets take this time to sharpen our love, learn to grow together, and sama2 menghargai apa yang namanya 'Rindu'. And Ill miss you, so so bad. And I promise you, if we get through this, we are strong enough to get thru anything. Ill b strong for you, and pls promise you'll be strong for me too. i heart you.

Sincerely,
Seorang Aqilah yang cuba menjadi kuat.

Regards, Qila

be happy.

Salam :)

Woke up, and feeling bloated sebab had a very late night dinner slash supper. Gee datang Perlis bcos he wanted to spend time with his friends, they are going home today. So before he went to his kolej (we live in diff kolej btw, sometimes in different state haha) he picked me up 1st bcos he knew I havent been eating anything for the whole day. Went to have 'dinner' and talk for a while, but it wasnot enough, the date was too short :( I was yawning bcos I was too full, plus, puffy eyes makes me sleepy. Give me a chance to make it up later boleh love? :))

So another 3 days being here. Slow2 the feeling starts to show. Im a panic freak, benda ni akan jadi each time Ill be moving somewhere new. Although my home in KT is not that new of a place, tapi thinking yang Ill be home *macam Gee cakap* for good, is somewhat making me anxious. Oke lah sebelum2 ni cuti je, kadang2 tak cuti pun as Im always busy and have things to do at uni during holidays, tapi sekarang, cuti forever la lebih kurang. Benda ni dah jadi after I come back from UK trip, and my Indo Program. Bangun pagi2 and feeling lost, macam 'Eh aku kat mana ni' and also rasa depressed sbb kena adapt with new environment. So blog ni nak cite pasal apa nanti? Hari2 buat cupcake, tido, makan, 3G dengan Gee, and so on and so on. Haih.

Im happy I finished my degree, tapi at the same time sedih nak tinggalkan environment ni. Lebih2 lagi sebab I have great, great friends, and of cos lah my boyfriend n fam is here. Tapi insyaAllah, ada rezeki Ill come back here. Paling2 lewat pun untuk konvo.

Dah buat checklist yang akan disetelkan kat rumah nanti, like if Im furthering, have to bincang with ibu about the lodging, transport. And then only Ill settle with the lecturers here. Kalau rezeki untuk kerja, Alhamdulillah. Mana2 dapat pun Im grateful, nak balas budi ibu dan ayah and saving for our futures, insyaAllah.

lets be this happy, like forever. :)

Regards, Qila

hush.

Salam :(

You know what hurts the most, lagi sakit than the fights? The silence.

Sebab you have nobody to talk to, to tell things, to listen to. Its lonely. And I dont do lonely. And that hurts the most.

Sebab you think you tried, but it wasnt just good enough. For anyone. So you are left alone. It feels like nobody understands you. You try to be understanding, you really tried, when you havent been that understanding before, tapi no use. USELESS. Bcos no one is that understanding to you.

And you are left with runny nose, and puffy eyes, crying, trying to sleep and hoping when you wake up its just a dream. But guess what? You wake up and its real. So you sleep again. Wake up, and its still real. And you just cant take it anymore, you just breakdown. The only comfort that you have is that Korean series that will accompany you for the rest of the night. But even the series will end, and you are left alone again. So you watch it slowly, part by part, making it last as long as possible, bcos secretly, you dont want it to end. Ever.

Isnt that sad? Do you feel me? Even if you feel me, what are you going to do?

Regards, Qila

Doodle

Salam :)

Had a very longgggggg day. Actually biasa je, tapi sebab kitorang dah lama tak spend time on the road that long, it seems so longg. Tapi yang penting lunch nasi kandar ayam goreng, with telur sotong. NYAMMM. Sedap oke. Then went to search for my dinner dress, got dinner today (on the 9th), its polka dot navy to match with Gee's shirt, Alhamdulillah it was easy to find, and I fell in love immediately. Plus the price is like YEAHHH :))) Got another 2 shirts, white and frilly and beautiful and girly. I likee :))

Also got this thing hari ni. Beli 3. 1 for me, 1 for Gee, 1 for Angah (for her bday, and she can use it to write cupcakes prices whenever she's opening a stall hee )

I love this thing, its sooooooo distracting. Hampir2 amik yang Majad haritu haih. Bila jumpa hari ni, I went wild :)))) Btw yang ni cntik, mine is a little cikai haha

Around 630pm went to K.Perlis with Armie and Zarimie to hang out. Then makan ice cream goreng, 4 biji sorang. Mula2 kitorang order 8 (each person got 2) tapi then Zarimie order lagi 8. Started to berbuih mulut when I reach the 2nd one. Gila muak, and kenyang. But satisfaction!

Esok have to book hotel, and also find Harummanis for the parents. Later.

Regards, Qila 

Degree, done

Salam :)

Sedang tersenyum lebar saat ni sebab finally, dah setel my viva. So I'm done with my Degree walaupun tak secara rasmi lagi, Alhamdulillah.

So memang la ada correction dan lain2. Tapi Im taking time off tonight sebab sangat letih and sleeepyyy. The presentation went well, within 30minutes and luckily salah seorang panel was not able to attend, so oke lah sebab sorang panel lagi is well known for her tolerance and shes v kind. So tadi macam sembang dengan orang yang lebih tua je la. I was able to answer all questions, and everyone was satisfied :))))

Tomorrow is Gee's presentation, tak sure am going or not sebab tak ada transport, and lagipun Gee cakap he's not comfy with people watching him present, so perhaps will see him after his presentation sebab malamnya ada dinner date with the gfs :)))

So tonight will sleep with a peace of mind, that Im completing my degree, finally. :)

Regards, Qila

of butterflies

Gee, sapa cakap awak tak pandai posing? Haha

Salam :)

I love that pic, particularly because I look oke *haha* and most of all because Gee menunjukkan emosi yang senonoh. Dia dah pandai senonoh dah Alhamdulillah hahaahahhahaha. Tapi of cos still ada lagi muka kerek pipi tinggi sebelah dia tu, at least 1 lah dalam mana2 album :D

My viva is tomorrow afternoon, dianjak awal 30minit ke jam 5.00pm. Man, rasa macam 300 kupu2 ada dalam perut. Im serious. Hari dinner tu pulak both of my examiners ada and masa salam2 diorang senyum penuh makna je. Tak sempat nak tanya apa expectation diorang nak tengok dalam my slides. And one of the examiners ni pulak baru dapat PhD in Polymer, mestilah kalau saya kelentong dia tauuuu. :(((( Im seriously nervous about this, tapi at the same time excited, Im one step closer to make my parents proud. Im getting my degree, at 22 years old, and I hope, i'Allah ada rezeki, my master at 24 :D Kalau dapat kerja, planning to do part time master, tapi tu semua dalam perancangan, and harap2 plan saya diberkati Allah dan dipermudahkan. Begitu juga dengan plan Gee, harap plans kitorang akan synchronize and dipermudahkan Allah sentiasa. Amin.

Gee patutnya present hari ni, tapi ditunda ke the 6th, supposedly dia lagi awal gembira da lepas, tapi tiba2 kena postpone. So saya happy 10% dulu k. Lg 90% lepas awak dan kawan2 lain dah habis sama. Dan lepas tu lets plan for a getaway ramai2, pls? :)

Tak ada dengar cerita about the extension (macam rambut pulak) of sem untuk ambil few more subjects tu so I have to be prepared to go home earlier than I thought. Will be going home with the parents nanti. So have to confirm with them sebab they have to plan their cuti and stuffs.. Hm.

So nak teruskan dengan kerja2 sebelum viva ni, and prepare for tomorrow. My only motivation sekarang ni is calling my parents, my supervisor, and Gee tomorrow at 5.31pm, saying I'VE FINALLY MADE IT. I'Allah.

Wish me luck  Wish us luck.
Utk pelajar2 Pusat Pengajian Kejuruteraan Bahan (Bahan & Metalurgi) All the best, and we'll see each other in our convo robes, shall we ;)

Regards, Qila

Hilang.

Salam :|


Garasi - Hilang

Dimanakah cinta sejati
Yang memberi ketenangan hati....
Sampai kapanku harus menanti,
Kau pergi dan mungkin tak kan kembali..
Dan aku menangis dan aku terluka..
Bila..
Dan aku menangis dan aku terluka....
Bilaa...
Engkau menghilang...
Kau pergi dari ku tinggal kan ku
Lewati malam tanpa kasihmu
Ku rangkai kata
Ku rangkai nada
Yang ku ingin hanyalah cinta
Dan semua menghilang..
Dan semua menghilang..
Dan semua menghilang..
Semua karena cinta ku menangis
Semua karena cinta ku tertawa
Semua karena cinta...
Semua karena cinta...
Dan kau tinggalkan hanyalah luka
Dan semua menghilang..
Dan semua menghilang..
Dan semua menghilang..
Semua karena cinta ku menangis
Semua karena cinta ku tertawa
Semua karena cinta...
Semua karena cinta...


Regards, Qila

-

Salam :(

Tell me what do you do, when it all falls apart?

Regards, Qila

Can and Can NOT

Salam  :|

Few words to remind myself. A lil something before I start on my work.

If you can't, don't. People can't make you do things you don't want to. If you say you can, go through with it, DO NOT complain. Its your fault at the first place for LYING to people, saying you can.

Okay, off to work, guess sleeping will be late tonight.

Regards, Qila

At last

Salam :)

Yea, gambar di atas adalah gambar salinan slip exam saya yang TERAKHIR wakakakka i likee. Alhamdulillah semalam dah habis exams, now prepare for viva. Saya masih tak bersedia apa pun lg. Uwaaaa.

I blame this late-finishing-exams sebab tak puas seronok habis exam dah kena prepare for viva. I mean of course la nak bersuka ria for a few days sebab dah bergigih ni untuk xms, tapi tak boleh sbb kalau bersuka ria, momentum for slide preparation akan lari, and nak cari dat momentum would take few more days at least. Ant time is something that I dont have. sigh.

                               

Paper collecting

                                         

Me, :D

Finished the exam at 12, got home at 145pm, had a rest and then Gee texted saying he is coming EARLY. Straight after Jumaat terus datang sini. I was likee YAYYY. Had plans watching Ironman 2, arrived early so had to wait for  few hours. Nasib sangat baik sebab the theatre was full, tapi kat blakang ada 1 couple seats lagi so yeaah :). Tapi couple seat Alor Star Mall theatre 1 tak best, nampak kepala orang je. Hmm. Plus had some audio problems sheesh. Spoil!

Tak sedar kan bila saya amik Gee? Haha

All in all sangat Alhamdulillah dah lepas exams. Tomorrow ada dinner untuk school. And I'll get my turtle babies after presentation lah kot. Tak ada masa nak jaga diorang sekarang. Bussyyyy.

So yea.

Regards, Qila